Sunday, October 3, 2010

To blog or not to blog

Yes, I know I said I was going to do this every day. But I've been busy. Work, kids, stuff etc.

Plus I'm not great with obeying my own rules. It's like when I took up running a few years ago. I'd always meant to do it, and had set my alarm early and said to myself: "tomorrow morning, when your alarm goes off, you MUST get up and go running!" Then when the alarm goes off tomorrow morning I say "stuff you self" and go back to sleep. So I just kept setting my alarm, putting my running shoes beside the bed, until one morning, without giving myself any prior warning, I got up and went running. Then I just kind of kept doing it. It was like the elephant in the room. I knew it was there, but I didn't talk to myself about it. And it seemed to work.

So here I am, staying up late when I'm tired, and just blogging. I've actually just spent a few hours writing something else so I don't really have a lot to say, except if it's about the future of digital newspapers, or how Dropbox works, or how it's great to have external hard drives plugged into your wireless router and dropboxes and stuff if you actually remember to copy that really important file that you did on the laptop onto them, otherwise you'll have to trudge off to the loungeroom and turn the laptop on and copy into your dropbox and onto the network drive (because you got so scared you'd deleted it when you couldn't find it anywhere you made yourself a little bit obsessively paranoid) before you can use it on the desktop.

My blogging may also drop off during the next week and a half due to all sorts of stuff I've got on but I'll still try to do it, because it's been a good exercise, forcing myself to put my thoughts into writing, forcing myself to describe in English what's been going on inside my mind.

Which reminds me - I've read my posts, and it seems like I think about serious stuff most of the time. No wonder I can't lighten up! Plus, disturbingly, I've already noticed a pattern: partially humorous opening remark, followed by opening discussions leading on from the remark, followed by a little story from my life, followed by grandiose moral posturing about the radical issues I feel it relates to, followed by some kind of home-made platitude along the lines of "if we could all just think like me, everyone in the world would transform into cosmic beings and be happy", before finishing off with a funny little kicker just to even the mood. Maybe I'm being a bit harsh on myself, but I'd rather be like that and be able to self-criticize than do what the Yanks do and tell myself I'm so amazingly wonderfully incredibly brilliant, intelligent, sexy and (to top it all off) humble and self-effacing that nothing I ever do could be anything short of the most brilliant thing ever to be written in the history of sentient life in the Universe, therefore I should feel comfortable with the pile of luke-warm, insipid, beige tripe I just choked up onto the plate, pat myself on the back and eat another side of ribs, a donut, and a bowl of diet ice-cream covered in fat-free maple syrup. I'm sure a healthy perspective is somewhere in the middle of the two.

Enough pendulum-swinging for one night. I have to get up at some ungodly hour tomorrow and attempt to find my way to work on Adelaide's woefully inadequate public holiday transport timetable. TTFN

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